Crasher Nove’s Driving tips spot

Broadcast
It’s just NOT working is it. I blame Crasher – it’s totally his fault
So far this week he has failed to give any sensible driving tips at all.
Mainly because he keeps anticipating the question and interrupting you.
Doesn’t he know whose show this is?
I think you need to give him a [...]

Charles Nove’s Driving Tips spot

Broadcast
In my vain attempt to inject some interest into your failing show – I am bashing on trying to enliven the Crasher Nove’s Driving Tips spot
Never mind his abject failure to give any tip yesterday, please can he advise on how I should negotiate the middle lane hoggers on the M4.
Should I go from the [...]

How about a Crasher Nove’s Driving Tips spot

Broadcast (not attributed)
Given Charles’s prowess behind the wheel, perhaps you could have a “Charles Nove’s Driving Tips”  spot.
So to give the spot a quick turn of the starting handle:
Could Charles please tell me “How should I stop?”
Should I adopt the brake gently approach –  giving ample warning to those behind or should I go for [...]

Broadcast  (At the start – but unattributed)
So at last it’s Crasher Nove’s week
Phew – Good News – at least that’s one less hazard on the roads whilst he is gainfully employed lashed to the Newsdesk for the next five days!

A few lines on Charles Nove’s bus and Deadly

Oh Charles Dear Charles
A word from all of us
If you want to stay sane and calm -
Don’t let Deadly drive your Bus!
For though fire engines have caused you grief in the past
The damage was small and did not last
But if Deadly got behind the wheel
The insurance claims could be surreal
Driving a bus requires a [...]

A little ode to Charlie Nove’s driving

Broadcast
Will you drive a little faster ?
said The Deadly to Young Nove
There’s a fire-engine just behind us
and I have reason to suppose -
If you brake now we’ll be scuppered
as they’ll drive into our rear
And the costs of repairing it
will be high – or so I fear.

Where is Charles Nove?

Broadcast
Where of where has Charles Nove gone
Were of where can he be
He’s been left off the website
He’s not there with Alan, Lynn or Boggeee!
Lynn is now a newsreader
If Tel’s website is correct
But Charles has not been mentioned
Perhaps he’s myth rather than fact!
But if Charles is not a person
Then who is reading the news?
Dear Tel – [...]

Someone’s been fiddling with it…….

Wow – so  someone has been fiddling with it!  Not a lot!  Not enough to really make a big difference!  Just enough to give that hint that maybe  – just maybe  – it’s not in a total backwater!
I’m referring  – of course – to your WebSite!
I don’t wish to be unkind but really!
Even though the [...]

GPs to be moved into Poly Tunnels

Look here my GP is definitely NOT working in our local Poly Tunnel.  I went there yesterday and all I found were a few plants.
I blame that Nove bloke – I’m sure I heard him say that GP surgeries were moving into Poly Tunnels to enable them to give more services.  But why does that [...]

Is that Major Dickie’s old Chum – Charlie “Over Nova”

Is it really Charlie – known as “Over Nova” in his younger days – due to his relentless pursuit of the young wenches!
Major Dickie last saw Charles at the Training Exercise in 1969 in deepest Buckinghamshire when he and “Over Nova” formed part of the Aerial Attack Team required to capture the enemy position at [...]