Oh Blumin Heck

Broadcast

Is he going to give us a recipe for Sunday Lunch?  I do hope so!

 

In which case do I need to scour the garden for snails or will the slug that’s just slithered across my window do as the first course.

 

We need advance warning – some of the ingredients he uses need time to harvest

BBC Cut backs

Broadcast

Well there’s a surprise.  You’ve survived another week despite the cut backs.  Well done!

Keep clinging to the wreckage.

Actually – good move on your part to move to Sunday.  No one of importance listens on a Sunday so ‘them’  on the 6th floor probably haven’t noticed you’re still around.

By the way – I do hope someone is listening??!!

BBC cut backs!

Broadcast (unattributed)  Weekend Wogan 2 october

Dear or dear

You’d think the BBC would have spared Strictly Come Dancing from the cut backs.

But no –  Tess Daly’s dress last night was the latest casualty  – one side of it had a large swathe of fabric  completely missing!

I do hope this is not the start of a worrying trend !  Good thing you’re on radio – keep those knees covered!

This Particle moving stuff!

Broadcast (partially!)

I don’t understand!

If it’s proved that particles can travel faster than the speed of light does that mean I will be able to get to my destination before I get there and if so will I know

I’m having enough trouble remembering where I was 2 minutes ago and why I’m where I am now.  If I’ve now got to remember where I will be I think I may end up confused.

Or is this so we can fast forward to the end of your weekly attempt at work?

Or  - even more scary – is it the reverse and I’m going to be stuck in a never ending loop of listening to your ‘humour’ !

It’s no good I’m off to lie down in a darkened room.

 

The satellite crashing to earth

Broadcast

No wonder they can’t find it – it was the one in charge of our gps systems

Mine has just told me I’ve reached my destination

Well where am I then.  I don’t recognise a thing!

Beckhams’ daughter

Broadcast (partially!)

If it is indeed true that the Beckhams daughter was born at half-past seven – hence the name Harper Seven

All I can say is just as well she wasn’t born at Six Thirty

Sex Thirsty  could give  people the wrong of idea of the young lady in the future!

At last some sensible research – red wine is good for you!!!

Broadcast

According to the Daily Telegraph yesterday (other newspapers are available)  – a glass of red wine is just as good as exercise.

In fact it is a Substitute!!!

And they’re right!!

To test this new research I downed a  Very Large Glass of the stuff  last night! (Actually – more than one)   The result was a happy contented feeling, slight exhaustion and a strong desire to go to sleep  – exactly the same feelings I get after going for a bike ride!

Hoorah  – it works!

Olympic Tickets

Broadcast

Wow!  I feel SO important!  I’ve just met someone – who knows someone – who’s been allocated a ticket to the Olympics.

How special is that!!

I am basking in the reflected glory

Compensation for Prisoners

Broadcast

I’m demanding financial compensation this instant.

I’m being “held in” from 11.00 to 1.00 every Sunday to listen to some veteran broadcaster on Radio 2!

Ladies Beach Volleyball

Broadcast

I do hope the weather is going to be better for the Women’s beach volley ball event next year or the young ladies will be turning out in their thermals – which may not be exactly the look you’re all hoping for!